|Did you ever managed/beat the problem (e.g., the ‘giving in’; the ‘attacking’)? How have you successfully coped with ‘violent reactions’ as a family in the past?
Did ‘the problem’ ever complied with you, instead of you complying with it?
When was (bearer of problem) able to lower the intensity (or frequency) of the problem?
When was (bearer of problem) able to do something with the problem? How did you notice? What was the first thing you noticed?
What did you/her do?
What did your mom notice? What did she do?
What happened on that occasion?
What did others say about this?
Have you ever seen your child coping/managing their own frustration? Has your child ever decided to cope in a more constructive way? Have they ever decided to do something different other than (e.g, threatening, blowing up, attacking)? Have you as a family ever done something different to avoid getting to a place where ‘giving in’ seemed unavoidable?
What did you do in that occasion?
What did you do right after, when you noticed she was deciding not to attack?
How did your child respond when you did that? How did the rest of that day/night go?
If by exploring this episode in depth we could learn something about your capacity to foster (e.g., setting helpful boundaries; mutual respect; peaceful coexistante), would you be interested in doing that?